The Revitalisation Realisation
by ljkwriting4life
Summary: Set between Seasons 7 and 8...A newly-engaged Penny is feeling restless, something is missing, and she needs to make a change. (Penny/Bernadette/Amy friendship, Penny/Leonard)


The Revitalisation Realisation

By: Leese

Rating: T (I think...I'm Australian, I'd probably get away with calling this PG+, it's somewhere on the border!)

Summary: Set in between Seasons 7 and 8...Penny is feeling restless and needs to make a change. Penny/Bernadette/Amy friendship, Penny/Leonard.

Author's Note: As a young woman who has short hair, I love seeing young women on television with similar hairstyles (and it's super-rare!) - so obviously I loved when Kaley cut her hair, and I wanted to write about it for Penny. Enjoy!  
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"Want another drink?" Bernadette asked as she and Amy watched Penny pacing relentlessly around her own living room. Amy was sitting at one of the stools at the kitchen bench, while Bernadette stood on the other side, blue kettle held aloft in an arm that was outstretched towards their friend.

"No thanks," Penny said on a sigh. She stopped pacing long enough to yank her ponytail free, run her hands through her hair, and whip it back up again into a messy bun. Then the pacing recommenced.

"No tea?" Amy asked with a frown of concern. "What's the matter, bestie?"

"It's nothing!" Penny said on a sigh, but she growled and flopped her arms out by her sides. "Augh, I don't know!"

Bernadette scrunched up her face and put the kettle down. She took a tentative step forward and tried to hold Penny's flickering eyes in one place.

"Is it wedding jitters?" she asked kindly. "It's okay if it is-"

"No, no, I want to marry Leonard," Penny said. She was still sure of that much. "I just feel-"

"Is it Sheldon?" Amy asked. "Is his absence tearing at your heart, to the point where you can't sleep at night because you're wondering where he is, what he's doing, and you miss the sound of his voice, and that little laugh…" Amy trailed off when she realised that Penny and Bernadette were both staring at her. She blushed, readjusted her glasses and cleared her throat. "Okay, moving on."

"It's not Sheldon," Penny said in earnest. "Though I do miss him."

"We all do," Bernadette said for Amy's benefit, but then glanced at Penny and muttered, "But for God's sake, don't tell him."

"Our secret," Penny whispered with a grin as she came closer. She retrieved the kettle and her mug and did help herself to a small, pathetic drink of almost-cooled water. Ha! Bernadette giggled at the Sheldon remark as Amy either pretended she hadn't heard or remained oblivious, lost in daydreams of her strange boyfriend riding trains and living 'off the land', as he'd put it.

Yeah, Penny missed him. Leonard missed him too.

"I think it's all the change," Penny said, doing her best to explain why she had called them over in the first place, only to spend the better part of an hour walking around not really able to engage with them at all. That wasn't like her, and she had called them because she knew they would help her get to the bottom of what she was feeling, if only she gave them a chance.

"So it is the engagement, maybe a little bit?" Bernadette asked. She knew marriage was a sensitive topic, and a big step for commitment-phobic Penny, but Bernadette also knew her friend was more ready than she had been previously.

"Is it the fact it's a long engagement?" Amy asked. "Is Leonard not comfortable? You said you wanted to wait until your brother was out of jail."

"Uh, yeah," Penny said, blushing with embarrassment. She really didn't like to talk about that. She hated what it did to her parents and she had only really gone into detail with Leonard, after he found her reading a letter she had received in honour of her birthday. And of course Leonard being the sweet and previously unloved guy that he was, didn't mind so much about the fact it had been sent from a prison, rather he focused in on the fact that her brother remembered her birthday and cared enough to write. Then she felt ashamed for feeling embarrassed, but she felt better at the same time, and she hated when that happened because it was just so damn confusing!

"Penny?" Amy asked when she saw that Penny's eyes had glazed over. "She's thinking about Leonard," Amy said wisely to Bernadette, who simply hummed knowingly. Of course Penny was thinking about Leonard. Big surprise!

"I feel restless," Penny finally said. "And almost like something is missing."

"Oh, I know!" Amy said. She leapt off the stool and raced to her large handbag on Penny's blue couch, from which she produced four bridal magazines like a hand of cards. She beamed over the top of them and almost squealed as she added, "I just couldn't help myself!"

"Nooo," Penny whined. "It's too soon. And maybe that's not really what I feel. Not like something is missing, but like…I'm forgetting to do something. I keep feeling like there's something I need to do, and I don't know what it is."

"I know what it is," Amy said with a sense of mischief as she abandoned all but one of the magazines and began to reverently stroke it. "Dresses," she whispered. She sat on the couch. "Pretty dresses."

"Okay, we better get those off her before she starts talking about her 'precious'," Penny told Bernadette quickly. Bernadette nodded and walked over to tempt the magazine out of Amy's grasp, and Penny smiled. It was kind of cool that she could make Lord of the Rings jokes, or drop a reference to Golem just for the sake of it. She finally felt like she fit in with these women.

Yet something still felt heavy, and it clawed at her from the inside. She didn't know what she could do to make it better, and she was about to plead for her two friends to help her, when Bernadette let out a girlish, "Aww!"

"Oh balls," Penny groaned when she realised that Bernadette had succumbed to Amy's lure, and they were both pouring over the bridal magazines. Penny supposed she had no choice. "Okay, just this once," she said. Bernadette and Amy looked at her with excited grins and Penny fought the urge to roll her eyes.

"Come, sit between us," Amy said reverently as they made room for her on the couch. Penny scrunched up her nose in mock indecision before relenting, and she flopped down on the centre of the couch and allowed them both to thrust their magazines towards her.

"This is so exciting!" Bernadette squeaked. "Another wedding, you and Leonard, it's so romantic, it's just meant to be."

"Do you think Sheldon and I are 'meant to be'?" Amy asked, clearly struggling with the concept of fate and whether or not she was referencing it correctly. The idea intrigued her; she wanted to learn more.

"Oh trust me," Penny said on a soft chuckle. "You and Sheldon are definitely something. He'll come back."

"I hope so," Amy said softly.

"Y'know, I felt like that sometimes when Leonard was away too, in the North Pole before we were even really a couple, and then on that ship, way out in the North Sea, when he was having all this fun with a bunch of other scientists...he did come back though, and so will Sheldon. You'll see."

"Ooh, what about this one?" Bernadette asked, still engrossed in the pages of dresses and flowers. Penny looked to where she was pointing, and with one gaze upon what was genuinely a beautiful, white dress, Penny panicked. She quickly stood up and started to pace again. "Too soon?" Bernadette surmised.

"Ahuh," Penny said with a nod as she held a hand over her stomach. "Don't get me wrong, I so, so, so want this…it's just, we've barely been engaged a week and I look in the mirror and I try to think of myself as a 'wife' and I just…I don't know…I'm gonna be Mrs Penelope Hofstadter."

"Aww," Amy and Bernadette said in unison.

"No, no 'aww'," Penny said, pouting childishly. "Look at me!"

"What about you? You're perfect," Amy said obviously. "And the name just rolls off the tongue. Penelope Hofstadter. Penny Hofstadter. That's you!"

"No wait," Bernadette interrupted before Penny could protest. "I know what she means. Penny, you mean you look in the mirror and still see this girl in her twenties who's just having fun with this man she's in love with, and that's great, and you really want to spend the rest of your life with him but you don't know what that's supposed to look like on a day to day basis, or how you're meant to act to make it happen. Marriage is something that grown-ups do, old people do it, and I think we established the last time we tried to be grown-up and mature and have afternoon tea that, well, let's just say age is relative."

"Oh my God, yes!" Penny said, nearly screaming that at last, someone knew how she felt. "What do I do about it?" she asked as she began pacing. "I don't want to freak Leonard out, but I need to do…I don't know…something!"

There was a period of silence where they all just looked at each other. Penny looked desperate, but Bernadette and Amy were thoughtful and serious.

"I know," Amy finally said matter-of-factly. "Throw it away."

"Throw what away?" Penny asked, suddenly fearful. She clutched her left hand to her breast as though it was Leonard himself. "My ring?"

"No," Amy said with a smirk. Then she stood and her eyes grew wide and earnest. She gestured as she spoke, and she got more and more enthusiastic. "The old you," she said. "Whatever you think is holding you back, symbolically, throw it away and go after something else. Maybe it's your clothes, for example. Or your job, or how you manage money, or maybe you need a new shade of lipstick. You could switch from running to something else to stay in shape, like dancing or pilates. Maybe it's the breakfast cereal you've been eating your whole life, I don't know, but why don't you just go and stare at yourself in the mirror and think about what is contributing to you feeling in a funk? Go and look into those big beautiful eyes of yours until you know what you need to do to help you feel like you can embrace the future you and, more importantly, to read this magazine with us without freaking out, because Goddammit, I wanna look at the dresses and the pretty hair!"

"O-o-okay," Penny said. She glanced at Bernadette to mediate, or translate, or to tell her whether or not this was actually a good idea. She felt overwhelmed. Bernadette offered her a very small, somewhat hopeful smile.

"That might work," she said. "And even if you can't think of anything, we should still go shopping. Maybe even some new underwear might help. Something sexy."

"Ooooh yeah," Amy said with a firm nod and a coy smirk. "Something that says to Leonard, 'I'm not just some girl, I'm a woman, take me Sailor'.

"O-o-okay," Penny said again as she began to back towards her bedroom. Amy was tripping over that line between reality and fantasy again, because Sheldon was the one who owned a sailor's hat. Maybe a few minutes to herself to at least calm down before they went shopping wasn't the worst thing Penny could do. "I'll set my timer for five minutes, how about that?" she asked them. "In the meantime, you two can drink more tea and look at pictures. I really do appreciate you bringing them, Amy. I know this is a big deal."

"Of course," Amy said with a smile. "They'll be here when you're ready to read them."

Penny let out a deep breath and then retreated the rest of the way to her room. She shut the door quietly and turned to stare at her bed. Amy did have the right idea, Penny realised. This strange feeling of restlessness Penny had was all up inside her head, and she just needed to do something to get it out.

Maybe a new bedspread, she thought. She'd had the same quilt for years, but then again she adored it. It was perhaps the only thing Penny owned that she actually cleaned with care, because she didn't want it to fall apart. It held so many memories. It had witnessed so much of life between her and Leonard, from the awkward fumbles their first few times, to the decision they made one day to simply 'power through', to all the times since that were just powerful and loving and all snuggly…even her whispered promise to Sheldon that she would never hurt his best friend. Nope, she was definitely keeping the quilt!

Next!

Penny chewed on her bottom lip as she opened her wardrobe and flicked through her clothes. She owned a collection of colourful dresses, tops and skirts, as well as going-out dresses that were perhaps just a tiny bit flirty, or slutty, and then were was her collection of tracksuits and comfortable clothes she wore when she was hungover or sick. Leonard affectionately called it 'sportswear', though she would never be caught dead running in the park in them. Finally, there were her shoes. Many, many shoes. Maybe she could pack some of it away, or maybe there was something about her style she could change. It still was a party-girl sort of collection, but Penny loved the bright colours, she adored those dresses, and she didn't want to become one of those middle-aged women who wore all black and grey every single day; those women could look great but that wasn't her. She needed colour all around, it lifted her, so no, there was nothing about her wardrobe or her brightly furnished home that she wanted to change. The shoes could stay.

However, maybe when Leonard moved in full time they would need to move some things around, but Penny really did not think there was anything in her home that he would ask her to get rid of. It was colourful, but it wasn't overly girly; the colour pink was generally reserved for her wardrobe and her lip-gloss, and Leonard loved her lip gloss! No, they would probably just need to make room for his clothes and collectibles. That was if they moved in there together at all. It was the simple solution, right across the hall from Sheldon, but whether it was before or after the marriage it was going to be hard. One look at the engagement ring and Sheldon bolted, everything had changed too fast for him. Penny really did hope he came back safely, and that he could learn to understand that she and Leonard weren't leaving him. In fact it was almost definite that they would live together right across the hall from him, at least for a while. She and Leonard could not imagine being anywhere else.

Focus Penny, she told herself when she glanced at the clock and realised that several minutes had already passed. Oh well, she could go into extra time. She was pretty sure Bernadette would keep Amy from strictly enforcing the self-imposed five-minute rule, because Bernadette knew how Penny felt and she knew this was important. A breakthrough was lurking, Penny could feel it.

She made her way into the bathroom. She had already established she was keeping the pink lip-gloss, and she couldn't change her perfume or her body lotion; Leonard practically worshipped her scent. Besides, changing those things wouldn't make Penny magically feel less restless, or less burdened, or less like she needed to do something only she didn't know what it was.

She braced herself on the sink and stared into her own eyes.

"Kill me," she said with a pout. She zoned out on her own reflection and just stared at her face, she mapped her lips and chin, her cheeks, her eyes. She tried asking herself how she thought she looked, objectively. Fear clouded those eyes as soon as Penny realised she was about to be really honest with herself, even though there was no one there to hear her. It was just as scary. "Okay," she whispered. "I look…young, kind of tired." She looked down at her ring finger and then brought her hand up to show herself the ring in her own reflection. She smiled automatically as the diamonds glistened, and she checked herself objectively once again. "And happy," she added.

She laughed softly when she realised she was conducting a sort of experiment, even if it was a little biased. Leonard would be proud of her.

Penny's grin widened but she chewed on her bottom lip again and narrowed her eyes, really examining herself. There was just something that suddenly felt kind of 'off' with how she looked, even though she looked just the same as she had looked for ages. If anything, her hair was the most natural colour it had been in a long time, a dark blonde with lightening tips. She loved it because it was so low maintenance, or at least the colour was low-maintenance now that she didn't have to worry as much about regrowth.

Penny sighed, but cocked her head to one side as her left hand reached up to untie her hair. She could tell that she had just focused in on her hair, and maybe that meant something. Amy had said she wanted to look at bridal hairstyles, and Penny had never given much thought to what she wanted her hair to look like as a bride. That just seemed bizarre to her. She pulled it down from the bun and rested the hair tie on the sink, before she ruffled her hair all around her shoulders so that it framed her face in loose curls.

"Huh," she said, when the answer she had been searching for finally struck her. It seemed so obvious suddenly, but the idea scared her nearly as much as the idea of getting married once had. It was something she had never done before, but it was exactly what Amy had meant when she said to throw out the old Penny, to find a way to freshen up parts of her life, embrace change and show herself and everyone else on the outside how confident and comfortable she felt on the inside.

Penny's eyes filled with tears as she raked her fingers lightly through her hair. She did that for several long seconds, before she held her breath and bundled her hair up at the back of her head. It was not a practice-wedding pose, or maybe in a way it was. She did not hold her hair so tightly that it was totally smooth, but just loose enough that about an inch framed her face from any angle. She turned her head from side to side, lifted her chin, lowered it, and her eyes never left her reflection. The base of her palm and the inside of her wrist was resting on her neck, and her pulse drummed rapidly as her anxiety battled with the stubborn determination that she loved herself for so dearly.

Penny saw the change in her eyes then. This was right. It was self-appreciation without vanity, and it suddenly felt like it was exactly what she'd needed to do all along. In fact, Penny could not wait another day before the deed was done. She was going to do it, she was going to cut her hair, and it was going to be fabulous!

Amy was going to have a heart attack.

So Penny wouldn't tell her, she decided, at least not right away. She grinned at herself and let go of her hair, watching it fall beautifully to her shoulders one last time. Goodbye, shampoo commercial! She squealed, it was embarrassing but she did, and then she bounced out of the bathroom and the bedroom and found her friends looking up because they had heard her being a dork.

"Well?" Bernadette asked hopefully.

Penny jumped in front of them and demonstrated her fantastic jazz hands.

"I've got it! Let's go to the shops!" she declared.

An hour later, Penny was sitting in a chair in her salon because she had begged them to fit her in, and she could hear Bernadette trying to comfort Amy somewhere in the background.

"Her beautiful hair," Amy kept saying. "Why does it have to be her beautiful hair? Curse me and my stupid suggestions!"

"Are you sure?" the hairdresser asked Penny. The older woman was fully aware of what was going on off to one side of them, and she knew Penny.

"Oh yeah, ignore her," Penny said with a laugh and a brief wave of her hand. The hairdresser spotted her ring then and grinned.

"Ooh, that's gorgeous. I didn't know you were engaged!"

"Thanks," Penny said with a grin. "It's new."

"Ah, good, it will match the new look." She picked up her scissors and with her other hand she grasped the ponytail she had put Penny's hair into, in order to take a huge chunk off all at once.

"I can't watch!" Amy said as she sat in the waiting room chair and buried her face in her hands. Penny rolled her eyes and gestured to her concerned hairdresser to lean forward a little.

"If she asks you for some of my hair tied with ribbon, please don't give it to her," Penny advised with a mischievous wink. The hairdresser laughed and after another firm, "let's do it", from Penny, the woman lobbed off the ponytail with a sharp swoosh of her scissors.

It took a while to get the style right, having to shape it from scratch, and then they decided on some colour. It was all going to take time, so Bernadette managed to drag Amy to a nearby coffee shop to read magazines and wait.

"Come on," Bernadette said in an effort to cheer Amy up. "It'll be great. Penny's beautiful no matter what. This is exciting!"

"It's all my fault."

"Honestly, I'm sure she'd thank you for it, Amy. You saw how happy she was when she made a decision. Forcing Penny to make decisions is good for her, it makes her happy and confident…don't take that away from her."

"True," Amy said thoughtfully as she met Bernadette's eyes and sighed. "What if Leonard hates it though? Then it will be all my fault."

"No it's not," Bernadette said. She smirked. "And Leonard is not going to hate it. Penny can't go wrong, the man's in love."

"And I suppose it doesn't matter whether he likes it or not, if she does," Amy said.

"That's the spirit!" Bernadette squeaked. They met each other's eyes and Amy slowly broke into a grin as she leant across the table to speak more quietly.

"I really want to be there when he sees it for the first time."

"I'm sure we can make that happen," Bernadette said, as the sense of conspiracy stirred her soul. "Would you ever cut your hair?" she asked.

"No," Amy said. "It balances out the proportions of my face…I tried once when I was a child, and 'the bob' ended badly. I feel pretty with long hair."

"You are pretty, Amy," Bernadette assured her with a smile. "I can't cut my hair short either, because it's so curly and blonde it puffs up and I look like one of those dolls people used to stick over their spare toilet paper rolls."

"Ha! Good one," Amy said with a grin. "You're right though, Penny's pretty no matter what."

"Yeah…lucky bitch," Bernadette said as she sipped her tea and sighed.

It was another hour before Penny rejoined them. She really wanted to sneak up and put her hands over Amy's eyes, but she and Bernadette were both wearing their glasses and it just wasn't the same. So she settled for walking up directly behind Amy and leaning towards her ear from behind.

"Guess who?" she sang with a smile. Bernadette had already spotted her and was grinning. "What do you think?" Penny asked. She sat down in the chair between them and looked from one to the other. Amy's mouth had dropped open and she was staring at Penny and her hair, wide-eyed.

"That's…that's…"

Penny and Bernadette gave Amy time to use her words.

"That's really short!" Amy finally managed. She reached out to touch the newly highlighted pixie cut that Penny had settled for.

"And you got it coloured too, it looks lovely!" Bernadette declared.

"Thanks," Penny said with a grin, not even needing to ask her if she was sure.

"Will it grow back?" Amy asked, before realising that for a scientist (and a human) that was perhaps the dumbest question ever. "I mean, will you grow it back?"

"Hmm, probably not for a while," Penny said as she sat back in her chair and shrugged. "I really like it. It feels super light. I think I'll be reaching up to check I still have hair for the next few days, and oh my God, I will be using so much less shampoo! This is going to save me money!"

"Did it work?" Bernadette asked her curiously. "I mean, do you feel better?"

Penny didn't know how to answer. The money issue was a surface issue and she couldn't vocalize anything deeper. She pressed her lips together as tears filled her eyes and she simply nodded. Yep, she felt better; the way, way down kind of better.

"Well I think it makes you look very mature," Bernadette went on. "And it's still really feminine."

"Thanks," Penny whispered, finding her voice yet again. "I think so too."

"Are you just saying that to try to make yourself believe it?" Amy asked.

"No!" Penny said, as Bernadette shrieked, "Amy!"

"What? Self-talk is a valid technique," Amy considered aloud. "She's crying."

Penny chuckled and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I've had long hair since I was a little girl," she explained. "It didn't occur to me until today that I might cut it, and it's so strange because even though it seems like a really big deal to everyone, even my own hairdresser, I don't regret it at all. These are happy tears. Is that weird?"

"No," Bernadette said. "It just means you did the right thing."

"It's how I felt when I finally asked Leonard to marry me, and then when he asked me and I said yes," she said as she played with the ring on her finger.

"Oh my God," Amy said softly. "You're going to have short hair when you get married!"

"Yeah maybe," Penny acknowledged. "So?"

"That's going to be so…so hot!" Amy said, suddenly changing sides. Penny grinned so entirely that her face hurt. She knew Amy couldn't possibly stay devastated for long, not once she realised how genuinely happy Penny was.

"It is, isn't it?" she asked mischievously. "I think Leonard will really like it too."

"Oh?" Bernadette asked. "Any special reason?"

"Well, let's just say there's now much less chance of my hair flicking him in the eye or getting caught up in his mouth, which does happen. One time right in the middle of things, he said, 'I think I need safety goggles!' It was hilarious!"

The three of them laughed as Penny confirmed they were both done with their drinks and ready to go home. Penny was excited, but as Bernadette drove them back to the apartment building she did become just a tiny bit nervous. The only thing making it easier was the knowledge that Sheldon was not there. As uncomfortable as that thought made her, it was true.

Of course Penny wished that Sheldon was still with them, and she hoped that he was safe and content and perhaps even having some fun, but if he had been home then the fact she had a whole new hairstyle probably would have been the end of him. There would have been the endless questions about 'why', from the man who had barely changed the way his hair was cut his whole life. Sheldon would just know Penny was the same, so there would be that intense curiosity of 'why now', 'what would possess you to take such a drastic step'…but drastic was moving halfway across the country in search of a new life, or quitting her job at the cheesecake factory to pursue acting even though she hadn't been hired for anything meaningful. Drastic had been holding her shaking hand out for Leonard to slip that ring on, or it might even be if she had dyed her hair bright pink, rather than a pretty average blonde.

At least she wouldn't have to defend herself to Sheldon right away. She didn't want to defend herself to anyone, actually. Did she really have to?

"Nervous?" Amy asked once they had parked the car and were making their way upstairs to where the guys were.

"A little I guess," Penny admitted. She wasn't nervous about Leonard, but the others…as much as she could tell herself their opinions didn't matter, shouldn't matter, they all were still her friends. It mattered.

"Believe me," Bernadette said. "If we walk in there like normal they won't even notice right away. Especially not if they're playing a game."

"That's true," Penny said, smiling softly. "We could do that. See how long it takes them to notice."

"Do you feel different?" Bernadette asked again. It had been awhile since Penny wasn't able to answer at the coffee shop. Another try wouldn't hurt.

"Yes," Penny said softly. "I mean I'm still me but I'm just…I feel lighter. I probably said that already, but it's hard to describe."

"It's okay," Bernadette said. "You're walking kind of differently."

"Am I?" Penny asked. They were only climbing the stairs, and not very quickly. Maybe she was holding herself more upright than usual, but she thought she had been doing that since the engagement anyway. Penny still could not believe that Leonard had been carrying her ring around for 'a couple of years'. He was yet to tell her exactly when he bought it, but she knew he remembered, and it was a story that could wait a little longer to be told.

"I can see it in your eyes too," Amy said. "I think my suggestion worked. You do look less restless. More, I don't know, comfortable in yourself."

"Okay you guys, and Amy you're a genius, but right now I really want to get upstairs and see Leonard," Penny said with a grin as she picked up the pace. They were boosting her ego, and dammit, it was working. It was true as well, and Penny wanted to make sure Leonard knew how happy and content and totally not freaked out she really was about this next phase of their lives.

As promised, Bernadette opened the door to the guys' apartment with very little fanfare and led the way in, followed by Penny, then Amy.

"We're back," she sang lightly, nothing out of the ordinary. Penny risked a glance at the living area and realised she could only see Howard and Raj. Both of them were sitting with their laptops on the couch, engrossed in some online game together.

"That was quick," Howard said, even though it really hadn't been. "Can we stay for dinner? We're pretty into this game."

"Um…if Leonard and Penny don't mind," Bernadette said cautiously. Penny suspected that Bernadette knew exactly how Penny wanted her night to end, and it did not involve late night video games and take-away-induced indigestion.

"Why would they mind?" Howard asked with a scoff, just as he looked up. His eyes latched onto Penny and she raised her eyebrows expectantly. "Oh my God," Howard said. "What happened? You look like a boy."

"What?" Penny asked as she self-consciously touched her hair. "Don't be ridiculous."

Raj had looked up at Howard's comment, and his eyes were wide and his mouth open as he stared at her.

"Why would you do something like that?" he asked. "You chopped off all your hair? Are you devastated? I mean are you really, really devastated?"

Penny sighed and put her hands on her hips.

"Raj," Amy said, coming to her defence. "Short hair is very 'on-trend'."

"Uh, Leonard!" Howard called in the direction of the bedroom, his loud voice laced with concern. "You might wanna come out here, buddy!"

"Hey!" Bernadette said angrily as she glared at her husband. "You are so rude sometimes Howie! Penny looks lovely!"

"Yeah, and I really needed to do this," Penny told both men in earnest as she wiped her sweaty palms over her hips.

"Really needed to do what?" Leonard asked, distracted, as he emerged from his room holding his open laptop. He had heard Howard's call and then Penny's voice, that voice that made his heart flutter and his stomach do somersaults. 'I really needed to do this,' she had said, and she sounded so genuine and so certain, and kind, and- "Wow," he said when he finally lifted his head and zeroed in on those two bright eyes and that smile that he knew he would be seeing every day for the rest of their lives together, and that was pretty great. "Hi," he said.

"Hi," Penny chirped.

"You changed your hair," Leonard said next. It wasn't a difficult observation. That morning he had helped her wash it, and there was definitely much less of it, but it was more blonde, and her eyes were shining. She was glowing.

"I did," she said matter-of-factly. Her hands were still on her hips, but they weren't digging in so hard anymore. "I thought it was time for a change."

"I love it," Leonard said quickly, surely, as hurried to the kitchen, put his laptop on the bench, and then took the last few steps towards her. Soon his own hands replaced those on her hips and she touched his waist and allowed him to get a closer look.

"What do you think?" Penny asked softly. "And before you say anything, choose your words wisely, because I feel great and I am so happy right now-"

"I love it," Leonard repeated, even though he was sure she had heard him the first time, or perhaps she was just anxious and it hadn't sunk in. He lifted one hand from her hip and brushed his fingers through the back of her hair. It smelt like three different kinds of shampoo and dye and fresh water – in other words, brand new – and before he could think of anything else to say Penny was kissing him, and his hand in her short hair was pulling her closer.

"Yeeeah, we're not staying for dinner," Bernadette told Howard in the living room, as they all watched Penny and Leonard. They weren't doing anything particularly risqué, it was just a really long, deep kiss, and then multiple kisses strung together to the point where Amy was completely transfixed. Bernadette grasped Amy's wrist and then she hooked her free hand around Raj's shirt collar and picked him up off the couch as well, almost like Mighty Mouse.

"I guess dinner's at our house tonight," Howard said as he quietly packed away his laptop and followed them out. "Bye Leonard," he hummed with a smug smirk towards the betrothed couple just as he pulled the front door shut.

"Yeah-huh-bye," Leonard mumbled. He finally dragged his lips away from Penny's and made the short trek to the spot on her neck just below her ear that she liked nibbled and kissed. Penny tipped her head back and moaned as Leonard's hand simultaneously explored her head, the back of her neck, her jaw. His mouth on her was heavenly and she really, really wanted to get him into her apartment so they could make love and then snuggle under her favourite quilt; another memory for its colourful data-bank.

"God Leonard," she whispered as he made love to her neck.

"I can't help it," he said as he finally lifted his head and grinned proudly at her. "My fiancée is the most beautiful woman on the planet, the most beautiful woman ever created, the most endearingly, incredibly sexy woman I could ever imagine-"

"You're selling it a bit hard there, big boy," Penny assured him with a confident wink.

Leonard chuckled and went to reflexively tuck her hair behind her ears for her, only to find there was very little to do.

"It's okay," she said when she saw his eyes flicker with embarrassment. "I'll do it too."

"Does it feel strange?" he asked. "Like something is missing?"

"Kind of," she admitted as she laid her arms comfortably over his shoulders and leant back into his embrace. "But honestly, this morning I woke up and felt like something was missing and I just, I couldn't find it, it was driving me crazy! Do you know what it was?"

"What?" he asked.

"It was the space where my hair used to be." She tapped her temple. "In here. I found it."

"O-kay," Leonard said with a wary grin, only half-understanding. He remembered she had told Raj and Howard that she 'really needed to do this', and to him that just meant this was an emotional thing, and it reminded him that she was brave. "Well I love whatever space it is you found," he said. "And I'm going to fill it with kisses in T-minus two minutes, which is the time I estimate it will take us to disengage and move over to your place, so that we can make out on your couch and not risk nudging over onto Sheldon's spot."

"Do you think, wherever he is, he can somehow feel when someone is in his spot?" Penny asked, aware that they had all respectfully left it vacant.

"Probably," Leonard teased. He grinned playfully and then let her go, only to take her hand and give it a brief squeeze. "I'll just pack up my laptop. I loaded a bunch of new movies onto it for us. We can watch one tonight."

"Sure honey."

"So you had a good afternoon then?" he asked as he moved back to the kitchen. He scooped it up, before locating the cord in the living room.

"I had a great day," Penny assured him. "I really love us, you know?"

Leonard glanced at her and saw her smiling almost uncontrollably, despite the serious premise lingering in her eyes; it continued to speak to him.

"I love 'us' too," he said. "And Penny, I love being surprised by you."

Penny grinned. On days like these, she kind of did as well.


End file.
